A 65-year-old woman has a heart attack and is rushed to the hospital.
While in the ICU, she has a near-death experience, where she sees God.
"Oh. My. God. Is my time up?"
"No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
So the woman recovers and contemplates her experience. She figures that since she has so much more time left to live, she might as well go all out and make the most of it. So she decides to stay in the hospital and have a complete makeover...the works: face-lift, tummy-tuck, liposuction, breast implants. She even has someone come in to bleach her teeth, color her hair and give her a new hair style.
After the last procedure, she's released from the hospital, but while crossing the street, she's struck by an ambulance and killed.
Arriving in front of God, she yells, "WTF? You told me that I had another 33+ years!!"
God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you."
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